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Tuesday, August 07, 2012

I Remember When

There are days that go by that I can remember what life was like before Fibro, before osteoarthritis, before Meniere's Disease etc etc. Then there are the days that I can't remember anything but.
Today is one of those days. It is a day where I can't recall the last time I didn't have to smile through the pain. That I didn't have to hide the excruciating throbbing in my lower back. I could go hours on end hearing every word being spoken and not smiling like an idiot because I couldn't hear the actual conversation.
I can remember when Doctors actually cared more about their patients then they did the amount of patients they could see in a day. Or how many prescriptions they wrote compared to actual treatments.
I don't remember the last time I could sit for more than 5 minutes without wondering if I was going to be able to get back up.
Most of all, I can't remember when I didn't cry so much. I can't remember the last time I had a week with no tears at all.
Pain is real, emotions are real, disease is real. Life..............
Is Hell

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